From DC to Amsterdam

Girl, what dates you talking about? May 31, 2012

It was several hundred dollars cheaper for me to fly out of DC than from BWI, so off to Dulles we went.

My mom and brother came along for the ride to the airport. The closer we got to the airport, the more I sensed mom's sadness about my departure. In addition to not visiting home during spring semester, I spent a lot of my break from ATL hopping from one city to another. While my mom is not very forthcoming with her emotions, it was evident that she wanted me to stay longer. Rather than just saying, "I will miss you", she offered me some money to have in pocket for my layover in Amsterdam. Love you too, mom.


I flew from DC to Detroit from then Detroit to Amsterdam (Detroit is a major hub for my airline, KLM). The flight from Detroit to Amsterdam is about 8 hours. I packed all night with the expectation that I would get sleep on the plane and start to adjust my sleep clock. No such thing happened. This flight was easily the worst international flight I've ever been on.

Nneka vs. the Stewardess

First of all, there was there was this one flight attendant was bizarrely standoffish with me the entire flight. She would be jovial and attentive to all the passengers around me. However, when she would come towards me, she would often walk past my seat, only to come back and say "oh, did you want something to drink?" in this condescending tone. Moreover, every time she walked past me, she would bump my arm and interrupt my sleep (I was in an aisle seat). For a moment, I thought it was in my head. However, even after I moved my arm to my lap, my seat would get bump. A) She was petite enough to walk down the aisle without bumping me and B) I observed no other seats or arms being bumped on her trips up and down the aisle. It was so strange. Maybe I looked like someone that fucked her over in the past. Anyway, she's lucky that we were on a plane and not in the street; punks jump up to get beat down.

Bologna and Company

In addition to the weirdly passive aggressive flight stewardess, I was seated next to this really irritating family. Two kids next to me (about ages 5 and 10)  kept whining, fighting, and kick me on my right side as they attempted to lay sideways in their seat. Their father, who was seated behind them and smelled like bologna, kept hovering over my row to instruct them to watch the monitor. I got a good whiff of that bologna smell every time he stood up, which was about ever 15 minutes.

A couple of hours into the flight, the kids start to settle down a bit. Just as I said, "thank goodness" to myself, a baby starts to cry a couple of row behind me. We aren't talking about an "I want a bottle" cry. This thing was WAIIIIIIILING!!! I don't know what was wrong with this kid, but it cried for the remainder for the flight. This was SIX. FREAKING. HOURS. Seriously, there need to be family zones on planes.

How did the flight end? Well, one of those kid sitting next to me vomited for the last half hour of the flight. It smelled lovely.

Schipolling in Amsterdam

My layover in Amsterdam was about 12 hours. Yeah, I know... sounds pretty awful. Actually, it wasn't too bad. Schipol is a pretty nice airport that is somewhat reminiscent of a high-end mall. It had multiple stories of shopping, spas aplenty, and nice restaurants and eateries ( I'll take some pictures on my way back to post). I did not do much shopping because the stuff was waaaaaaay out of my price range (there was a Rolex, Cartier, Swarovski, and Burberry store in every concourse I passed. Because, you know, you just can't fly without first buying a new Rolex watch and Burberry jacket.) I've always wondered about what sort of people go on shopping sprees in airports.

After my awful flight, I figured I would check out one of the many spas in the airport. I finally passed this one contraption called "The AquaMassage". The manager of the spa came up to me and said "Don't look, give it a try. Only 1 euro a minute!" Since it was actually within my price range, I gave it a shot. Ooooooooohhhh, it was LOVELY. If you ever see one, do it!

You remove your shoes before getting into this thing and it massages you from head to toe with high-pressured streams of water. You do not get wet because the water is contained in the upper half on the machine. There is a layer of impermeable fabric between you and the water. It was simply amazing. I actually had to stifle myself from audibly going "oooohhhhhh" and "ahhhhh" too loudly, given that this place was fairly public.

Unbeknownst to me, a crowd gathered to watch me get my massage. When I got out, there was at least a half dozen people staring at me or asking me "how it was", haha! The woman pictured above decided to give it a go after I gave my positive endorsement.

To pass the 12 hours, I shopped, walked around the airport, and got a second massage from a different spa. Sadly, my Aquamassage machine went out of order by end of the evening but the second spa was womaned by a lovely manager. She even gave me a free extra 10 minutes! All in all, it was a pleasant stay at Schipol.

Up next: Arrival and First Impressions of Nairobi